I am blogging about a thorny subject to me, that of friendship. It is prompted largely by a good friend I have of late called Al, who is departing Liverpool to work abroad. Friendship generally is an experience that I feel I have had more success in of late. It has come hand in hand with the growing insight into who I am and what makes me tick. It involves me being able to tell my story to others, good and bad. For much of my life this ability had evaded me. My discomfort, anxiety and the like invaded my thoughts to such an extent that my attempts to be 'me' invariably hit a bum note. It was only when my attempts to reach out to people that incorporated these difficulties that relationships began to become more understandable to all parties.
When I begin relationships from this standpoint, as I did with Al some years back now, it sets me up to be able to be more authentic and honest. As with Al and other acquaintances and friends I have made of late, I have discovered that my difficulties and experiences are far from unique. In point of fact; I am almost convinced that the normalcy that for decades I aspired to was a mirage all along.
So to Al; he is leaving town to take a job in Athens teaching English. He is nervous about this and as a friend I am trying to support him. He is in the process of reducing his life down to a few transportable bags to go, with some less essentials boxed and stored for a later date remaining here in storage. I don't have much experience of this as my cautious nature has led me to staying in the same house these last twenty two years but I am trying to help. I am also discovering in the process more about Al; I knew he had lived a very different life to me in terms of going out into the world, that growing up in Canada he moved to the UK in his mid twenties, that he has lived in four or five towns and cities here, has lived in Portugal and also in Athens previously. What I am learning is more details about his roaming existence because the challenges now he is experiencing preparing for another move are bringing memories of those times to the fore. Along with other mutual friends we are all by proxy exploring his various options and dilemmas, this in turn is bringing up our own experiences of coping with changes. It's proving to be an intense and emotional time for us all. It is again is shining a light on this thing called friendship that I feel such a novice at.
I wanted to have more about Al in this blog, about what a good friend he has been to me over the last few years, how Betty loves him too. He has appeared in earlier blog posts as he is a regular with the Pets and Pals activities and generally there or there about in my life while writing this blog. I will just plug his artistic endeavours and a link to his website though. it's one of the attractions to him with the job abroad, it will allow lots of free time for him to continue developing this craft that means so much to him.
I intend to visit him in Athens when he gets settled. This in itself will be another big challenge for me and will take me way out of my comfort zone. It will involve me taking myself off to an airport alone, navigating that whole world which to date has always required me to have help and support. I can blog about it and update you on Al's big adventure at the same time. I may not have to wait that long though, what with the connections that technologies like social media. Al is part of the Liverpool Mental Health Consortium world with me and he has made some leaving town speeches to the various groups in the last few weeks. We have joked that he can be our own correspondent in Athens but perhaps that is not such a fanciful idea after all.
This period of my life, in the last few years is special to me in that it has included a number of close friendships within it. For the reasons I have outlined above it is not without its challenges but with friends around these challenges are proving to be navigable, life seems a lot less scary and I feel very blessed.
When I begin relationships from this standpoint, as I did with Al some years back now, it sets me up to be able to be more authentic and honest. As with Al and other acquaintances and friends I have made of late, I have discovered that my difficulties and experiences are far from unique. In point of fact; I am almost convinced that the normalcy that for decades I aspired to was a mirage all along.
So to Al; he is leaving town to take a job in Athens teaching English. He is nervous about this and as a friend I am trying to support him. He is in the process of reducing his life down to a few transportable bags to go, with some less essentials boxed and stored for a later date remaining here in storage. I don't have much experience of this as my cautious nature has led me to staying in the same house these last twenty two years but I am trying to help. I am also discovering in the process more about Al; I knew he had lived a very different life to me in terms of going out into the world, that growing up in Canada he moved to the UK in his mid twenties, that he has lived in four or five towns and cities here, has lived in Portugal and also in Athens previously. What I am learning is more details about his roaming existence because the challenges now he is experiencing preparing for another move are bringing memories of those times to the fore. Along with other mutual friends we are all by proxy exploring his various options and dilemmas, this in turn is bringing up our own experiences of coping with changes. It's proving to be an intense and emotional time for us all. It is again is shining a light on this thing called friendship that I feel such a novice at.
I wanted to have more about Al in this blog, about what a good friend he has been to me over the last few years, how Betty loves him too. He has appeared in earlier blog posts as he is a regular with the Pets and Pals activities and generally there or there about in my life while writing this blog. I will just plug his artistic endeavours and a link to his website though. it's one of the attractions to him with the job abroad, it will allow lots of free time for him to continue developing this craft that means so much to him.
I intend to visit him in Athens when he gets settled. This in itself will be another big challenge for me and will take me way out of my comfort zone. It will involve me taking myself off to an airport alone, navigating that whole world which to date has always required me to have help and support. I can blog about it and update you on Al's big adventure at the same time. I may not have to wait that long though, what with the connections that technologies like social media. Al is part of the Liverpool Mental Health Consortium world with me and he has made some leaving town speeches to the various groups in the last few weeks. We have joked that he can be our own correspondent in Athens but perhaps that is not such a fanciful idea after all.
This period of my life, in the last few years is special to me in that it has included a number of close friendships within it. For the reasons I have outlined above it is not without its challenges but with friends around these challenges are proving to be navigable, life seems a lot less scary and I feel very blessed.