I’ve done a blog on loss and bereavement before but as it’s a big subject for me its inevitable the subject would come up again. In it I outlined some of the early seeds that were planted in my psychi as a child, ones that grew into an unwieldy thorny bush pricking at me on the inside, this went on for many decades causing me all sorts of trouble. I am much better at containing this bush now, the sharp spikes softened so as to not hurt much at all but I remain very interested in the subject of how we grieve.
This interest has manifested itself of late quite a bit; partly just through day to day conversations with people while out, usually when people ask what I do with my day...’what work do you do?’ that old chestnut. But also more pointedly when I ask people to get involved with a project that I have set up called ‘The Pet message Board’ where we combine a photo with a message responding to the question what does your pet mean to you and the images are collected and displayed on the Pets and Pals website.
A casual conversation that I had this week with a woman I had only just met had her recounting a situation after her husband died, how she would throw some of her husband clothes on the floor for the dog to roll about in and how the family dog would find so much comfort in these familiar smells. She explained how she would find herself joining in the ruck, sharing the grief together in a very physical way. It was a lovely poignant image she painted for me, something that feels important to retell.
The Pet Message Board has been up and running and on the Pets and Pals website for over a year now. The tone of responses has generally been very up beat; I think my dog makes me happy/ V. happy the most popular sentiment; small children are there too showing a brightly coloured picture of their favourite pet with some indecipherable text is always good for an ‘Ahhh! More recent offering are leaning towards the departed pets, ‘I miss Bob the dog-a great friend’ being a stand out for me. Quite a few times recently I have been explaining the project to people at our Park events and have had to press the pause button as opposite I am looking a face were the tears are welling up in the eyes of the listener.
‘There is only one certainty in life-we’ll all die’ – it’s probably a glib overused phase, but it still resonates with me. I guess some lessons are so important that to keep saying it, to hammer home the message is fine..by me.
This interest has manifested itself of late quite a bit; partly just through day to day conversations with people while out, usually when people ask what I do with my day...’what work do you do?’ that old chestnut. But also more pointedly when I ask people to get involved with a project that I have set up called ‘The Pet message Board’ where we combine a photo with a message responding to the question what does your pet mean to you and the images are collected and displayed on the Pets and Pals website.
A casual conversation that I had this week with a woman I had only just met had her recounting a situation after her husband died, how she would throw some of her husband clothes on the floor for the dog to roll about in and how the family dog would find so much comfort in these familiar smells. She explained how she would find herself joining in the ruck, sharing the grief together in a very physical way. It was a lovely poignant image she painted for me, something that feels important to retell.
The Pet Message Board has been up and running and on the Pets and Pals website for over a year now. The tone of responses has generally been very up beat; I think my dog makes me happy/ V. happy the most popular sentiment; small children are there too showing a brightly coloured picture of their favourite pet with some indecipherable text is always good for an ‘Ahhh! More recent offering are leaning towards the departed pets, ‘I miss Bob the dog-a great friend’ being a stand out for me. Quite a few times recently I have been explaining the project to people at our Park events and have had to press the pause button as opposite I am looking a face were the tears are welling up in the eyes of the listener.
‘There is only one certainty in life-we’ll all die’ – it’s probably a glib overused phase, but it still resonates with me. I guess some lessons are so important that to keep saying it, to hammer home the message is fine..by me.